How To Not Kill Your Landlord
by tomas30
Summary: Ah, freedom. After Byakuya reluctantly loans them money for an apartment, Rukia and Elli, Rukia's best friend, find an apartment and move in within a couple of months. But what's up with the weird landlord? ichigoxrukia, renjixelli and more M for language
1. Chapter 1

A/N i do not own bleach, Ellie is not my oc , and xthe unwantedx is my beta

It was hard for her to believe what had just happened in the past eight weeks.

Rukia lay on her bed in her new apartment as she and her best friend Elli had just finished moving in.

It seemed like the right thing at first. It was hard for her to say no to Elli after she found out that Elli had been kicked out of her house right after graduating high school.

(Flashback)

"They did what?" said Rukia in surprise.

"They kicked me out of the house," said Elli sadly, "saying that since I've graduated from high school, I have to move out and get a job for college."

"That's just low for parents to kick there own daughter out of the house right after graduating." said an infuriated Rukia.

A few minutes later

Rukia and Elli were standing in Byakuya's study.

"Brother, will you loan us some money?" asked Rukia.

"Why do you need money now, Rukia?" said Byakuya in annoyance.

"Well, you see, my friend Elli was kicked out of her house by her parents after graduation," said Rukia, "and we were just wondering if you would give us some money so that Elli and I can move into an apartment. Seeing as you being the C.E.O of a company and all."

"No, Rukia, you shall not move out since you already live in a really nice home that your sister and I worked hard to make for you." said Byakuya.

"Fine, brother, we'll not bother you anymore." said a disappointed Rukia.

Outside of Byakuya's study with the doors closed.

"Man, your older brothers a pain." said Elli disappointedly.

"I know, but I have an idea. It's so good, it just might work." said Rukia with a smile on her face.

Later in the kitchen

"Hisana, we need your help." said Rukia, walking into the kitchen with Elli.

"Yes, what would you like Rukia?" asked Hisana with a suspicious look on her face.

"Brother won't loan us any money." said Rukia.

"Why do you need money now, Rukia? Did you break something? 'Cause if you did, your in big trouble, little..." said Hisana before getting hit in the face by Rukia.

"What was that for, Rukia!?" yelled Hisana

"That's for calling me little." said Rukia with a vein pulsing.

"We didn't break anything, Mrs. Kuchiki," said Elli, "We just need some money so that we can move in to an apartment since my parents kicked me out after graduation. That's all. But, your Mr. Kuchiki won't loan us any money."

"O.K. I see now why you guys need money. Now, lets go talk to Byakuya." said Hisana with a smile on her face.

Back in Byakuya's study

"I already said no, Rukia, and here you are, bring Hisana in this mess." said Byakuya in annoyance.

"But, Byakuya, if you let them move out," said Hisana, "when the servants leave for their convention, we'll have the entire mansion to ourselves. But, since you don't want Rukia to leave, then I guess we won't be able to have any fun." Byakuya's eyes widened at the note of this.

"Fine. Rukia, how much is the apartment and who do I make the check to?" said Byakuya.

(End Flashback)

"Hey, Rukia, can you give me a hand with these dishes?" asked Elli.

"Be there in a sec, Elli!" Rukia yelled from her room.

She new it was going to be nice not living with her brother and sister, but it was going to be hard to do at the same time.

As Rukia was walking to the kitchen, she heard a knock at their door.

"Rukia, can you get that?!" Elli yelled from the kitchen.

"Sure thing, Elli," Rukia said as she was going to the door.

Right when the door opened she heard, "Hello, I'm your land lord..."


	2. Chapter 2

chapter two

"Hello, I'm your landlord Ichigo Kurosaki and this..." said an orange haired boy before getting pushed out of the way by a red haired boy.

"I'm Renji Abarai. I live with Ichigo." said the red head.

"Yes, well come on in. I'm Rukia Kuchiki. Um... is he gonna be okay?" said Rukia with worry in her face.

"Ya, it happens all the time." the red head said with a grin on his face.

"K... you can just pull him in on the couch." the raven haired girl said, pointing to her unconscious landlord.

After ten minutes trying to bring in the unconscious Ichigo, Rukia told Renji to go and sit on one of the chairs in the room while she gets some water.

'She's just wonderful,' was all Renji could think about at the moment.

"This is my best friend Ellie." Rukia said, pulling a fighting girl out of their kitchen.

"No, I don't want to! I want to get the kitchen set up!" yelled the blond girl to her roommate.

"I'll help." said Renji, "It can't be that hard, can it?"

"See, Rukia, um..." Ellie said in confusion.

"It's Renji." he said.

"See? Renji will help me and we can get to know each other as well." Ellie happily said.

While Renji and Ellie were in the kitchen, it was only Rukia and Ichigo.

'Why... do I feel this way near him? It's like he's gonna be someone special to me,' Rukia thought.

Then Ichigo started to stir and woke up.

"W... where am I?" he said with a look of confusion on his face.

"You're in our apartment. Renji knocked you out cold for 10 minutes." she said.

"I'm gonna kill that..." said Ichigo.

"WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU CALLING SHORT!" yelled Ellie.

The next thing Ichigo and Rukia saw were knives flying out of the kitchen and sticking in the wall.

"You're fucking crazy!" Rukia and Ichigo heard Renji yelling.

"We'd better go in there and stop them." rukia said.

One hour and a bunch of band-aids later

"Okay, now, Ellie, why did you start throwing the knives?" Rukia said calmly.

"Well, I asked for help to put something away and he called me short," Ellie said with a vein pulsing in her forehead.

"No, I didn't. I just said it's good to have a tall person here." Renji said in anger.

"That's it. I'm gonna kill you for calling me small!" Ellie yelled.

"Shut the hell up." said a strange man with blue hair. "I'm trying to get some sleep, and Kaien is trying to study for his exams." he pointing to another man with black spiky hair.

TO BE CONTINUED 


	3. Chapter 3

"Shut the fuck up!" yelled a blue haired man with a rather large scar on his face. "I'm trying to sleep and Kaien is trying to study!"

"Get the fuck out, Grimmjow. We're having girl problems," said Renji in a pissed voice.

"Who's this 'we', Renji? It doesn't look like I just had, like, twenty knives thrown at my face, now, does it?" said Ichigo with a smirk on his face.

The girls laughed at the ridiculous face Renji was making.

Grimmjow then saw the raven haired girl and stared straight into her amethyst eyes.

"Your starting to creep me out, Grimmjow." Rukia said, obviously a little freaked out.

"You heard the girl, Grimmjow," said Ichigo. "Get the fuck out of here."

Ten Minutes Later

"Hey, Ichigo. Are we allowed to have pets asked?" Ellie asked with a questioning face.

"Sure, as long as they don't bother anyone else living near you." said Ichigo with a confused face. "Why do you ask?"

"Oh, I just wanted to bring my cat here instead of leaving him with my parents." she replied.

"Well, that's fine I just hope he's house trained," said Renji.

"Hey, Ichigo, I've been looking for you all day. My roof is still leaking. Tell Grimmjow to stop filling the tub to the very top before getting in it." said a pissed off girl with glasses and dark brown hair.

"Shut up, Savannah. Can't you see..." said Ichigo before he got punched in the face by Savannah.

"DON'T TELL ME TO SHUT THE FUCK UP! AND, GRIMMJOW, I DON'T CARE IF YOUR SLEEPING, PEOPLE, BUT SLEEP AT NIGHT! NOT AT 12:00 IN THE AFTERNOON, ASSHOLES!" yelled Savannah.

"WHAT THE FUCK, BITCH?! WHY DID YOU PUNCH ME FOR TELLING YOU TO SHUT UP?! I'M TRYING TO TALK TO THE NEW RESIDENTS!" yelled Ichigo.

Then, all of a sudden, Ichigo and Renji got shot in the forehead by two airsoft pellets.

"Come on, bitches! I thought you were good at this." said a blond who was wearing desert camouflage pants and a S.O.A.D. T-shirt and a Bleach backpack while holding an airsoft SAW. His friend Bob was in full digital camouflage, holding an airsoft sniper rifle.

"DICKS! Can't you see we have new residents?" Savannah said, hitting both Tom, the blond, and Bob, the brunet.

"WHAT THE FUCK?!" Bob and Tom yelled at the same time.

"You idiots, Ichigo is talking to these two girls about living here." said Savannah, a little angry.

"Aww, but, Savvy-chan, how come the one day we have a day off from school, the new residents have to come and move in?" whined Tom.

"Baka-kun, I know that. And I also want to play, but they're busy now. Maybe next time," Savannah said.

"We don't mind. We'll play. There's an airsoft club at our school, so we know how to play. Plus, we don't mind getting dirty." Ellie commented.

"SWEET!" yelled all the boys.

"We can go play, just as soon as we get the rest of our stuff put away," said Rukia with a smirk on her face.

"Aww..." said all four boys in disappointment.

"Just help them." Savannah said, stomping on Tom's foot.

"Ow, ow, ow. Okay, that's what I was going to do, anyways," Tom said in pain while holding his foot.

"Fine, I'll help, but I'm not going anywhere near the kitchen with Ellie in there." Rukia and Ichigo were laughing so hard they fell to the ground.

After about ten to twelve minutes of laughing, Ichigo and Rukia explained what had happened earlier that day.

When all of the laughing and embarrassment was over, the girls went to put clothes away, leaving all of the guys to move the furniture and food the girls brought with them. Thank God they didn't bring their beds! The guys then arranged the furniture so that it was comfortable and able to move around.

After that, the guys went to get gear for the girls and themselves. While doing that, they noticed there was an odd number of people playing. So, they went and asked Grimmjow if he wanted to play for a few rounds with them. He agreed and got his gear.

TO BE CONTINUED... 


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach, airsoft, or Tsubasa.

After three hours of getting ready, everyone went to Urban Survival's battle ground, bringing Kurogane, Fai, and Syaoran with them.

It was a good thing for them that Bob's dad worked at Urban Survival so that they were able to get in for free.

"Okay, the groups are going to be Ichigo and Rukia, Ellie and Renji, Tom and Savannah, Grimmjow and Bob, Kaien and Syaoran, and, finally, Kurogane and Fai. Do you all understand?" Bob's dad asked.

"Why the fuck am I with that douche-bag?" yelled Kurogane.

"Aww, Kuro-woof, why are you being so mean to me?" said Fai in a girly manner.

"I swear that guy is gay," said Tom. "That's proof enough. Do you agree gu..."

"DON'T TALK ABOUT PEOPLE WHEN THEY'RE RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU, YOU DICK!!!" Savannah yelled, hitting Tom in his manhood making him pass out.

After tom woke up, they started their game. Ten minutes into the game, Renji almost got hit in the head by Bob's sniper while trying to cover Grimmjow with his M-16.

Syaoran and Kaien found Kurogane and Fai easy with Fai continuously saying, "Wait up, Kuro-pu,can we rest? My legs are tired."

When Syaoran and Kaien got there, they found a tape recorder and were ambushed by Kuro-woof-woof and Fai. Kuro-sama had about six semi-auto glocks. Fai, on the other hand, had two ozies. In the end, Syaoran's and Kaien's semi-auto pistols were no use against Fai and Kuro-pu.

Tom and Savannah were busy with making a base in the woods so that they could just wait for people to come near them and be ready for them.

"This is a stupid idea, Savvy-chan. Why are we using so much wood for this stupid thing? Are you even listening to me?" whined Tom.

"What? Did you say something? I was listening to 'Feel the Mambo', sorry." said Savannah, taking out her mp3 head phones.

"You guys are soo boring to watch, soo... we're just gonna attack now, kay?" Ichigo said, tossing an airsoft grenade into their base.

"Shit, move Savvy-chan!" said Tom, doing a dramatic matrix jump in front of Savannah, getting hit with the stratnel and the airsoft pellets.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Savannah screamed, looking at Tom on the ground with a bloody arm.

"Don't worry, I'm okay. It's just some minor wounds. I can take care of myself. Just get out of here to somewhere safe for awhile. Then kick there asses, kay? Tom said with a devilish grin on his face.

"Kay, kay. I love you," was all she said before kissing him and leaving for safety.

"Freeze, bitches!" Was all Ichigo could say, pointing his gun at Tom. He then heard a scream from Rukia when she looked at Tom.

"What the fuck happened to you?" Ichigo asked.

"Well, it's your fuckin' fault, to start." said Tom in a pissed off voice. "If you hadn't thrown that grenade in, I wouldn't have jumped in front of it to save Savvy-chan."

"Oh, so Savannah's not hurt at all. That's good." said Rukia in a relieved tone.

"Here, dude, have our first aid-kit. You're gonna need it way more than us," said Ichigo, tossing Tom the box.

Right when Tom got the first aid-kit, Savannah pulled Tom out of the base and threw in a grenade of her own.

"Fuckin' bitch!" Ichigo yelled as he to pulled Rukia out of the base so as not to get hit.

"YES! Our plan worked, Baka-kun!" said Savannah just as she pulled Tom into a passionate kiss.

"See what I said, Tom? War pulls the love out of people, now, doesn't it?" Ichigo said with a smirk on his face as Rukia shot Savannah, getting her out.

After that little predicament, Ichigo and Rukia started to leave before Tom called out.

"Wait, Ichigo! Take my SAW, it may come in handy." Tom gave his SAW over to Ichigo and then finished bandaging his wounds. Him and Savannah then proceeded to make-out.

Renji and Ellie were trying to find out were the sniper shot came from for ten minutes when they suddenly heard the snap of a twig behind a tree. They then quietly snuck up to the tree and lit Grimmjow up. Then saw Bob's laser pointer beam and lit him up just as bad.

The last three teams then met up at to where they started to do a final show down.

Everyone started with a dramatic run to the right.  
Tom just put his M-14 on automatic and lit up Renji while Rukia shot Ellie in the leg.

Then it was Kuro and Fai vs Ichigo and Rukia.

Kurogane started shooting at Ichigo while Fai was complaining how he won't shoot a girl. Right as he said that, Rukia shot him in the balls.

"Avenge me, Kuro-woof-woof! Avenge me, kuro-pu! Avenge me, Kuro-pufia!" Fai said before becoming unconscious.

"Don't call me those fucking names, you dick weed! I hate it when you say those names!" screamed Kurogane.

"See, see, see! I told you he was gay..." said Tom. Savannah responded by hitting him on his cut up arm.

"OW, OW, OW, OW, OW, OW!" yelled Tom and then he ,too, fell unconscious.

"Don't take your eyes off of your opponent, Kuro, or else you might lose." Just as Ichigo said that, he pulled out Tom's SAW and lit Kurogane up.

Ichigo and Rukia won a free meal for two at the restaurant 'Bankai'.

To Be Continued...

Sorry it's a little late. When I finished the first time, it said my time had run out, so I had to do it again. Good thing I saved the draft while I was in the middle of it... 


	5. Authors note

authors note

hey guys sory to all the people tht have acctually read this story and liked it but right now at the moment 4 the past year and half ive had writters block and i can never seem to think of something 2 write and when ever i do it's always at work or at school so i never get the chane's to write a note about wht i came up with and i also figured out tht i can help people come up with ideas for thier stories alot faster than i can for my self so if you want help with some storie idea's ill try my best to help out ok

for those who read my stories and dont have any stories of thier own id be glad to give you guys some story ideas or pairings for some of my fav animes and books if you want to know what the are


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